Original Articles

5 Awesome PTI Programmes that will make you forget about BISP

 

5 Awesome PTI Programmes that will make you forget about BISP

1. Asad Omar Hot Air Bullshitting Competition. This program will generate so much surplus gas, we will be able to get 1,000,000 MW daily

2. Imran Khan Commitment Cycle – one can change their position every day. Sometimes twice a day

3. Fawad Chaudhry Lota Programme – nuff said.

4. PTI Dry Cleaning and White Washing Award – good for washing Financial, ahem, Trangressions as well as getting Gora Skin bleaches

5. And in light of the current PTI-MQM ideological alliance – the Altaf “Baapu” Award for Non-Violence

The success of these programs will make everyone forget about useless programs like the BISP. After all, BISP is for stinky, brown masses of Pakistan. Abominations like BISP and “KRUPPT” Benazir have no place in the Al-Baak Drawing Rooms of Pakistan.

Here are 5 more.

6. The Ayubian University of Selective Values and Disproportional Outrage

7. The Meraj Mohammad Khan Award for Moral Consistency

8. The Jehangir Tareen School of Business Ethics

9. SKMT Cancer Hospital – only takes those cases that can be fully paid for by the patient who also has to recover. Serious cases and the poor need not apply.

10. Peshawar Metro: Fully functional ………. in 3020 AD and at the bargain cost of $9.1 trillion (inflation adjusted for 2019)

The last 2 are actually proving to be true.