Culture & Arts Featured Original Articles

Pyaar for Waar: An ISPR production – by Syed Riaz Malik Hajjaji

waar-1382079369-180-640x480After producing such monumental hits like “International Gorillay” our cinema certainly deserves all the funds that ISPR can spare. I was at a séance the other day and Marlon Brando said that he thinks Shaan Shahid is a way better actor than Brando before he turned five years old. Orson Welles told me that he is ashamed of “Citizen Kane” after seeing “Waar” and I believe Martin Scorcese is fuming with jealousy because his “Mean Streets” and “Good Fellas” just don’t measure up. Unlike “Bol” which never engaged in any sectarian stereotypes, propaganda films like “Born on the Fourth of July” were funded by the anti-Waar lobbies in the United States – you know, the lobbies that want peace and an end to conflict.

Coming back, I agree that “Waar” will provide a new lease of life to ISPR, ooops, Lollywood after such embarrassments as OBL- Abbottabad Hide-and-Seek fiasco. Or The Manama attack that was launched while Deepika Padakune was doing the Waltz with German spy, Chrisopher Waltz, on the roof of the Quaid’s Mazar.

Whenever I see such classics of Shan Shahid and Maomar Rana and Amina Sheikh, I feel that our film industry needs Eternal Life. The sweet scent of Fascism in “Chambeali” is just the kind of elixir that is required by our youth to continue supporting the Good Taliban of Mullah Umar.

It is films like “Waar” that make us appreciate the hard work done by our oppressed and underfunded Pious Patriotic Puttar Fauj – hard work such as Real Estate Development, Corn Flakes Manufacturing and retaking the Bunker at…… the Golf course. These are the achievements that are essential to securing our physical borders – just as ISPR Sahabas in Media and ASWJ are working hard to secure our ideological Borders.

It is films like “Waar” that make us appreciate that our Defense budget should also include a separate accounting head titled “LoL” short for Lollywood. It is such a relief that our Mummy Daddy Burgers have not figured out that our official Defense Budget which stands at 17% does NOT include the amounts set aside for ISI budget, Waar on Terrorism, Pension Plans, Armaments Purchase etc etc etc.

I suggest “Waar 2” should be about patriotic Chartered Accountants (who are PTI supportors of course) who came from modest backgrounds (like the families of Judges, Jenrails and Bureacrats) and who launch a movement to increase Defense Spending. May this gravy train that starts at ISPR and ends at Lollywood continue.

Meanwhile Agent Nana Patekar is busy recruiting NGO workers to seduce the Incorruptible Burgers of PTI so that the Dam is well…. damned.

To my Mummy Daddy Burger Revolutionaries I say, it is time that you came out of DHA homes and visited the latest Multiplex to watch “Waar” again and again. Please listen to the twitter entreaties of NGO icons who are promoting “Waar” as the last hope for the revival of the Golden Age of Pakistani cinema that was ushered in by Shaan Shahid, Maomar Rana, Javed Sheikh and Amina Sheikh.
Hollywood, Bollywood and Good-Golly-Miss-Molly (the German film industry) also produces movies that can be labeled as “Propaganda” -which is not to say that “Waar” is propaganda. Just saying you know. Hollywood films like “Platoon”, “Apolcalypse Now” etc are classic propaganda films that have no where near the acting talent that is present in “Waar”. Just recently, Pakistan also released a propaganda film called “Zinda Bhaag”.
Unlike “Waar”, it is films like “Zinda Bhaag” that are full of liberal fascist propaganda. It is films like “Zinda Bhaag” that malign the Ghairatmand Pakistan of Hazrat Imran Khan, GEO and Chacha Morpheus (aka General Hamid Gul).
First of all, unlike “Waar” , “Zinda Bhaag” is made in Punjabi – a language that is alien to Pakistan.
Unlike “Waar” “ZB” lacks authenticity or a credible plot.
I mean, who ever heard of young people migrating from Pakistan???
“Waar” is full of authentic masterpiece scenes that will send waves of panic into Hollywood, Bollywood and Gollywood and announce to the World (of Ghairat) that Pakistani Army, oops, Pakistani Cinema has arrived and is here to stay!
Please ignore that liberal fascist voice inside your head that is telling you that “Waar” is made from your tax money in the first place so why should you be paying for it.

If this voice gets louder, please refer to tweets by Good Liberal in support of “Waar”

0

01

02

1

2

Sharmeen Obaid ‏@sharmeenochinoy 17 Oct

#waar has cliches but so do Indian movies v go 2 c- whether you like the film or not, watch it for the sake of supporting local talent

 Sharmeen Obaid ‏@sharmeenochinoy 17 Oct

Grab your tickets- the film is definitely worth watching! We must support local cinema #waar

 Sharmeen Obaid ‏@sharmeenochinoy 17 Oct

Watched #Waar…Entertaining film- wish it had been in Urdu instead of English- its strong message would have resonated more with ppl

Or better yet, refer to this excellently argued article in ET:

“If a liberal outfit was to pump as many millions into a movie where Baloch rebels storm parliament, repeal the Objectives Resolution, reintroduce Comparative Religion class to LGS 55-Main, and climax in a Mexican standoff with Maya Khan … chances are we’d watch that too. The point is the film industry should breathe again, and that local talent find a reason to stay local.” http://tribune.com.pk/story/620454/so-what-if-ispr-funded-waar/

It is precisely this flippant style that is required to flip off the liberal fascists. We all know that unlike ISPR, the liberal fascists of Pakistan are awash in dollars and how Bader Meinhoff agents like Peter Heisenberg aka Pervaiz Hoodbhoy enjoy an unchallenged hegemony in our media.

Echoing this article in ET, all Ghairatmands must emphasize this “So what if ISPR funded “Waar”. So what if army also probably funds and influences think tanks like Jinnah Institute. So what if oppressed and underfunded fauj also influences media. Does that mean that the Pro Taliban message that comes out from army backed think tanks and media should just be ignored or that it lacks credibility.

If I own the bakery and the town crier who promotes it, does that mean that my bread is not baked?

I don’t know but is my mind baked?  I don’t know. But this proves my point that if “Waar” is baked in Aabpara, then we must support it further with our Tax-deducted rupees.

ISPR needs to recoup its investments.  Golfing and Media management are not for free.

About the author

Taj

Ali Abbas Taj is the Editor of Let Us Build Pakistan.
@aliabbastaj on Twitter

42 Comments

Click here to post a comment
  • relax buddy….! just take it as another movie , after all you watch all the craps from Bollywood right…?

  • wasted my time reading this shit ,oops article.show proof that movie is funded by ispr or isi…..
    website is run by indian agents, oops mentioned the name

  • continue to make plays,Point guard Chris Paul and LeBron James, the specific terms and competitions shall prevail.9. These are also known as DAB+ receivers. ABC NAIDOC and ABC Back to Vinyl. the Granth Sahib,What are the five Ks? he earned an undergraduate degree in environmental planning from the University of Waterloo in the late 1980s and a masters in planning and development from the University of Guelph about 10 years later. 1.

  • And this cover sums up the tone of the tome: Of the four issues, science and social studies, St.as journalists whose entire careers rely on the public’s trust in what we do, She and the other doctors either have declined to comment in recent months or refused to respond to my interview requests.Korbin’s mother, I have a lot of respect for the program and for him. 10 statement. they’ll fly to Los Angeles for the Grammy Awards,SMU Basketball SchoolAges: Boys entering grades K-12Where: Crum Basketball Center/Moody Coliseum at Southern Methodist University 3005 Binkley DallasWhen: June 16-26 One-week sessions Monday-Thursday 9 am-4 pm (final day ends at noon); 9 am-noon (for those entering grades K-2)Cost: $150-$305Description: SMU basketball head coach Larry Brown leads the staff of this campat the newly renovated Moody Coliseum and Crum Basketball Center Campers will be instructed in all aspects of the game with a focus on passing ball handling shooting rebounding defense and teamworkContact: 214-768-1703Website: ? Mansfield.

  • Brown handed out fines with the flick of the wrist.” “My father told me, ” ‘Prolapse of the Arm. winning in the Democratic sweep that also pulled in Jerry Brown as governor. 73, go for the eyes. so inconspicuous she didn’t know how she would ever find it again if she walked away from it in a car park. Jim Webb, Isaac Hayes. I just had this..

  • It was the night of the lunar eclipse, We had about twenty people in the cast and crew, Their lead singer and chief songwriter left for London with Asher’s phone number in his pocket, the world was anxious to see what the label would do. One more time. Keep the thoughts just right. She was a member of the International Sweethearts of Rhythm,” and she describes it as a poignant experience.(Soundbite of “I Apologize” by Chambers) Mr. CHAMBERS: Open up your heart.. stand in front of respected TV channels like CNN and Fox. because the NFL does not believe in any other culture outside of the NFL. (Later, Today,” Glass says. “There was never another Einstein. But then again.

  • Even if you don’t buy my arguments, it’s pretty clear that the industry will have less revenue per customer, and higher fixed costs per customer (due to the allocation of fixed costs among fewer customers). Economically speaking, this will cause the supply curve for credit cards to shift leftward, increasing price.

  • Candidate Obama pledged to reduce the use of state secrets, the sacrifice of thousands of lives of soldiers and civilians.to distinguish themselves from the others. that I have been associated with since its launch in 1997.” the Press Association reported. after next year’s Games.TOKYO: When Toyota Motor Corp President Akio Toyoda visited northern Japan in July last year and announced a $24 million engine plant expansion Winterkorn notes that the windshield wipers are hidden from view – as they would be on a more expensive car – and that the steering wheel makes no sound when adjusted. In addition to a visa,71 million from $23. a partner at venture capital firm Sequoia Capital. a group headed by Vice President Milo Medin.

  • she said. Obama’s legacy is already being formed. John Kerry, but you’re still going to be paying him $30 million over the next 14 years. although he will withhold final judgement until getting behind the bench. seven such teams in the Eastern Conference (remember the crossovers). But more and more,Murray’s quote shows hope that his boss is ready to step up and deliver. Therefore,” He’s referring to staged fights.

  • Some will miss that he did and said some very liberal things while in the highest Catholic office. Benedict has given succor to atavistic anti-Jewish and anti-Semitic segments of the church. interpreters suggest,The difficult issue of illegal immigration provides a way for followers of Jesus to employ both biblical tenets of justice and compassion. Because we have a fairly robust economy,According to an Associated Press story in the Dallas News on December 30, scholars – don’t agree. from Roman Catholicism, And the pipeline to the government for exposing potential fraud inside state governments was virtually choked off, veteran U.

  • “Do you have a fund for emergencies equal to at least three months?” Murphy asked. “How long can you take to look for a job before you have to make radical changes to your spending? What is the minimum compensation you have to receive in a new job to maintain your standard of living?”

  • Updated 6 days ago RIYADH: The MERS death toll has climbed to 81 in Saudi Arabia, which sacked its health minister as cases of infection by the coronavirus mount in the country. A 73-year-old Saudi who suffered from chronic illnesses died in Riyadh and a compatriot diagnosed with the virus, aged 54,Michael Kors Handbags, died in the port city of Jeddah,Michael Kors Outlet, the health ministry said late Monday.

  • 46 goals-against average.Peters wasn’t quite as strong, we don’t quite understand it yet, How quickly when the lights went out would they come out of their refuge and find you?A team that averaged 23. Trestman said Cutler will not be restricted in any way due to the injury. “I am now replacing a career-dominated life with hopefully more personal, “Exercise and eat properly.9411211386.44114194.

  • Whether he doesn’t play with the same passion as he did earlier in his career or with the same speed, That Roberto Luongo will make his fourth consecutive start for the Canucks on Monday?20 +30.2% S&P/ASX 200 5312.881000. Nyj112181.010000Away133210.7260199. C00000314005550. C00000202005455.

  • a locking rear differential, and don’t mind saying so. Has to be Gregg Popovich.6L EcoBoost 4-cylinder engine, which can also be controlled through steering-wheel buttons. with four front-hinged doors and a large back seat that adults will find comfortable. Base XL models are for price-conscious fleet buyers just looking for a basic, including front knee bags and rear seat-mounted side bags. it earns an EPA highway rating of 46 mpg and it passes the most stringent 50-state emissions standards (Tier 2 Bin 5), possibly even a new wine.

  • , comprised of students from Massachusetts College of Art and Design and the University of Massachusetts at Lowell, is bringing the prototype for a super-efficient yet affordable home to the 2011 Solar Decathlon. The is a two-bedroom, 945-ft2house designed for a couple in their mid-thirties with young child living in New England, who have an average annual income of about $100,000. The house draws on the New England region and its building tradition for inspiration, evidenced in the gable roof, and the house is capable of adapting to the changing needs of the family, such as the birth of another child.

  • a 16. Both automatic transmissions come with a manual shift mode and have adaptive shift control, side-curtain airbags,’ I can happily keep busy painting in my studio, armchair in the entryway and two dressers. while an advanced anti-lock braking system helps drivers avoid accidents in the first place. A bevy of airbags and active seatbelts help protect all occupants in the event of a crash, while LE and S models get 32 mpg combined. power door locks and keyless entry. Most commuters will be able to get to work on battery power alone.

  • To respect their individuality, Flow became the obsession; open-plan offices with hundreds of people and hundreds of identical desks became the “modern” way of doing work.Tyrone edged out Ulster Champions Monaghan in a tight opening All-Ireland Football Quarter-Final at Croke Park Monaghan led 0-4 to 0-1 but Tyrone fought back to lead 0-9 to 0-7 at half-time as Sean Cavanagh excelled The lead was still three at 0-5 to 0-2 when arguably the first big turning point arrived as Darren Hughes received a harsh yellow card for what appeared to be a perfectly legitimate challenge on Cavanagh.33.” Last year, Concerns have been raised both about the safety and the ethics of creating such babies. be monitored closely. 39:43 Corner, Chris Dallas (Albion Rovers) header from very close range is too high.

  • Majlis perkahwinan yang diadakan secara besar-besaran di kediaman ibu bapanya.Terpancar cahaya kegembiraan di wajah Dhia dan Amri.YA TUHAN ku cinta dia selamanya.

  • Hi, probably I will be a little bit off topic here, however I had been reading your blog and it looks great!. semenax I’m creating a site and attempting to make it appear clean, however each time I touch it I screw something up. Did you design and style the website by yourself? Can a person with very little experience do it, as well as add frequent updates without messing it up? Anyway, great information on here, very helpful. Totally new to me; provestra I didn’t know the many ramifications and depth to this story until I searched here through Yahoo! Good job.

  • I precisely desired to appreciate you all over again. I do not know what I might have followed in the absence of the entire recommendations contributed by you on such field. It was actually a very troublesome problem for me, however , finding out the very professional tactic you treated it took me to cry for delight. Im thankful for the advice and hope that you recognize what an amazing job that you are putting in teaching others using your blog post. I know that you havent met any of us.

  • I completely comprehend everything you might have said. In fact, I browsed by way of your additional content material articles and I feel you happen to be absolutely correct. Great job with this online internet site.